If February was the month of waiting – waiting for better weather, waiting for a day that I didn’t have to wear 10 layers of clothing, waiting for March – well then March (I waited for it and it came!) is turning out to be a test of patience already. No, I’m not complaining about the weather. I’m over that, it makes me sound ungrateful, all that whining. What I mean, is waiting is hard work, not even fun work really. How do I do a better job of it?
I’m someone who wants the fast answers, results too. Got a question? Answer it. Got a problem? Solve it. Need something done? Ask me – on it already. Gotta lose weight – well, why aren’t the pounds gone already?!! When it’s in my hands I can make things happen fast and I’m kinda proud of that. So when it’s not in my hands, someone else gets to pull the strings, waiting turns out to be quite challenging for me. Right now, there are a bunch of things that are completely out of my control for which I must patiently await the answer. Patience is the key word here!
With waiting, apparently, comes patience. The answers I want are not coming at the speed I need. When that happens my put-together self comes a little unglued. I woke up yesterday feeling like that and every good intention I had for getting my workout in before the sun rose, every optimistic thought I had, every new creative idea – it all went to jell-o. Have you ever felt that way, like you were oozing out of yourself?
Waiting happens all day long. You’re in the line at the bank and you’re wondering what the heck is taking somebody half an hour to get their business done. Then you wait at the doctor’s office to hear the results of your physical. You wait for test scores. You wait for eggs to boil. You think crazy things while you wait – or at least I do – when I am on hold with the airlines attempting to change a flight.
This kind of waiting is normal waiting (well maybe not the airline wait) but I mean the kind of waiting that can change your life. That seems to be happening right now for me. I need to move on some major issues in my life – selling my house, moving somewhere else, jobs I have bid on, contracts, career decisions – so patience is in big demand. I am learning to be more patient, a skill I wasn’t born with. The more I am tested, the more I learn to understand what the real lesson is, why I am in this position. It makes me slow down and take in the moments, the sun, the first spring breeze, a smile, coffee with a friend, a moment with someone who cares, living not far from me, driving to pick up my mom who lives hours away and was housebound through the winter. I take time to think less of my situation and more about others.
I also tried to undo the unglued nature of my brain and heart by talking to someone with a level head. That was my eldest daughter, who is not only a gifted naturopathic healer but a woman with a clear head. She knows me well. I found in the sharing of my angst over having to wait, that my burden seemed lighter, not so glum. In my own head I had overcomplicated things, taken them too personally. Rachel helped me see how to simplify it all, to hit the Pause button for a day or two, while placing my ego on the shelf. How right she was. Kelsey and I went for a long walk in the early spring warmth and felt re-energized. Uplifted.
I also put someone else in front of me. On Sunday for example, I visited a dear friend who has been on her back for 8 months with a fractured spine. She has borne her bed rest with grace. A normally industrious gal, this 76 year old has had to learn to take it lying down. Now that takes patience. She does it all with a smile and through retaining a strong vision of what will be possible after she gets up off that bed with a totally healed spine. I brought soup. Yellow flowers to cheer her. News. Stories. Today I am going to bring her one of my trampolines so she can begin to rebuild her strength, gently and safely.
Waiting, patience and faith. After the waiting and patience comes faith, an element of our beliefs that is completely invisible but nonetheless there. Like oxygen, for example – it’s all around us, we can’t see it but we know it’s there because we are still breathing. That is faith. It’s in us, around us, propping us up when the $#IT hits the fan, when we are tested, when we must wait, when we must be patient. Faith is the ingredient we need to get us through our frustrations, tests, challenges. Faith is the ingredient that propels us through life no matter what the circumstances.
Faith doesn’t operate on its’ own however. We need to apply ourselves body, mind and soul to our endeavours. This means you and I. Frustrated with your weight loss or fitness results? Have faith. If you have done the work, eaten clean, trained, sweated, journaled, then results will come. A fitness program like Boost or Fitness Commitment is only a program, it’s not a miracle worker. You are the miracle worker. When you put you into the equation, results will happen. Your results are not dependent on me. Sure I can push you, motivate you, guide you even write your programs but in the end your results depend on you. And I have complete faith in YOU.
We can however, keep the faith together, as a community, a sisterhood of like minded people striving to reach similar goals.
Here for you always,
Warmth and hugs,
Tosca Reno